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One book on psychology, that I listened to as an audio-version
2019-07-25 21:22:16
The book was originally published in 2003, "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life", translated into Estonian in 2005.
In general, the book draws attention to our patterns of thought and, as a result, to behaviors, that seem normal to us, but can actually harm both ourselves and other people. It teaches us to observe ourselves and improve our thoughts, behavior and life. The book points out, that we all act in a violent way, but we do not notice it, because we don`t know much about it. We assume, that we are not violent, because we think about violence only by fighting, killing, wars - things that ordinary people do not.
In reality, things are much more complicated, and violence is divided into physical and passive, where in the latter case the pain is more emotional and far more cunning than physical violence. This eventually creates anger in the victim, which in turn responds with violence. So violence causes violence. In other words, passive violence is what spills the oil into the flames of physical violence.
Unless we are the change we want to see in the world, change will never happen. Unfortunately, we expect others to change. Non-violent communication is a way of thinking and a way of life, but it is not something that makes us gentle or quick to succeed. Non-violence is about embracing positive attitudes, understanding things as they really are. Everything we do, is driven by selfish motives, especially in a materialistic society. Non-violence is about expressing the positivity inherent in yourself.
In the book, the author explores the factors that influence our ability to remain compassionate and non-violent. The use of our language plays an amazing role here. The writer has tied communication - talking and listening to a certain method that leads us to giving from heart and compassionate communication. This is what he calls "Non-Violent Communication." In some societies this method is known as Compassionate Communication. Learning this way of communication strengthens our ability to remain calm and humane even in the most difficult situations, helping us change the way we express ourselves and listen to others. By each contact, we are able to listen to others and ourselves and our deeper needs. This method of communication replaces our old models of offensive or defensive behavior with which we respond to judgment and criticism with new patterns of thought.
There are interesting stories and examples in the book, it's quite bulky and also exiting, so I recommend reading it. I have heard, that many other people also use audio versions to read books, and I recommend it too, because this way we can do sports (or just walking) and reading at the same time and also rest our eyes in today`s smartphones and computers world.